Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Buttons and Bears (random thoughts)

There is so much to say in order to catch you up. So, I'm not going to, I am just going to start a new and see how far I can take you.

I am 36 weeks pregnant, 8 months and counting. My sweet little boy is due on August 2nd and I am so excited. Today I spent all day making curtains and decorating the nursery with my mom. There is something about sewing seems and buttons with your momma that brings great peace. I feel as though every small touch I give to my little boy's nursery is an investment. An investment into his life, into the home I have begun to create for my husband and now this child, and a commitment to the raising of this sweet boy that the Lord is giving us. What an incredible blessing and responsibility. I continue to pray that He will teach us how to be parents. What an incredible Abba we have. For the last 8 months I have just been listening. I never want to stop.

I have so many questions;

What will he look like?
What does serving God as a mother look like?
How do I teach him everything I know he will need to know?
What will he love to do?
What will his first word be?
Will he be passionate?
Will I know how to do all I am supposed to do for him?
?
?
?

And every time I begin to ask these questions, I begin to pray. My hunger for prayer has grown as this baby has grown inside me. I feel as though sitting in the Lord's presence, sitting at his feet is the only way to learn. He is so patient with me. I think this is where I am going to need to stay as I walk this road of motherhood.

There are bears and buttons everywhere. My baby's room is filled with books and colors. I pray he feels love, knows hope, learns to trust, understands incredible growth and depends on The King for everything. I pray he proclaims the Kingdom, aches for people, cries for righteousness, and dirties his knees from prayer. I pray that he starts life in the comfort of this room but ends it enwrapped in the mystery of the Lord.

The curtains are finished. There is so much more to do. I feel as though this is just the beginning.